Wonderful Wipeouts

So, in case anyone is wondering, (This is presupposing people even read my blog which I am not really sure if they do) it turns out that I did have strep throat so I feel even more justified in spending the $200 to get checked out and get antibiotics.

This weekend I was feeling pretty much fully recovered. My friend, Kristy left for the Philippines today so I wanted to spend some time with her on Saturday. This, of course, was after I woke up at 6am to watch the UT/OU college football game. It was kind of a strange game but at least my team won.

Kristy wanted to go to Makena beach, which is one of Maui's premier beaches. It's really beautiful with a huge rock wall that's a deep reddish brown that contrasts stunningly with the blue water and tan sand. Little do many people know, but on the other side of the rock wall is an unofficial nude beach. That is a story for another time.

This is only the second time I have really gone to the beach since I have been here. I often go to the beach by my house to read my Bible and journal. I don't really count this as going to the beach since I don't wear my bathing suit or actually go in the water at all. Kristy is a real surfer not an occasional surfer like me. As we were putting our stuff down on the sand, I asked Kristy if we were far enough from the water's edge. She assured me we were given the water mark on the sand and I took her surfer, water knowledgeable opinion seriously. We were still setting up our stuff on the beach, when a rogue wave came and attacked our belongings. Apparently Kristy's surfer sense was not as reliable as we both had thought. Luckily I had placed my valuables farther from the ocean and was able to snatch them up quickly. Our only real casualties were a couple of wet/sandy towels.

Now Makena beach is beautiful but it is also a little dangerous for those not experienced with the ocean. It has a shore break, which is where big waves break right onto the shore. Saturday it was very big and I estimate some of the waves reached at least six feet tall. The lifeguards even used their megaphones to warn inexperienced people to not go out into the water. This was the perfect set-up for one of my favorite pastimes here: watching tourists get pounded by waves. Kristy and I kept our eyes on the people who looked the most inexperienced and just waited for them to do something stupid. It didn't take long.

A couple was in the water who definitely didn't look too savvy. The woman of the couple looked like your average frumpy 60 year old but her male counterpart was a bit more interesting. Kristy initially thought he was covered in sand but it turned out to be hair. Ewww! And he was covered with it. He wasn't fat but his body was very strange. He seemed to have loose skin hanging in weird places, an unfortunate byproduct of being old. He also accentuated his weird body by wearing a little black speedo bathing suit. Double ewww!

So, Kristy and I watched as this couple attempted to get out of the ocean. The most dangerous times for tourists are entering and leaving the ocean. This is when we pay attention. The couple decided to be bold and attempt to body surf. Body surfing is often harder than it looks, especially when a six foot wave is threatening to slam you into the sand. We saw the couple at the top of the wave. Then, we saw white foam and misc. body parts tumbling about like a washing machine. After a few seconds, the couple emerged stumbling and sputtering. They lurched toward the sand and stood looking at the waves and breathing deeply as they recovered. Kristy and started laughing hysterically until the man started to rid himself of the sand. He reached his hands deep into his black speedo and fished out handful after handful of sand. What a disgusting conclusion to a wonderful wipeout! Yuck!