Elastic Basket for my Peaches

I also have a website: www.lizhightower.com

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Ruminations during TAKS

I spent 7 hours watching my kids take the big TAKS test today. I make a point of not looking too closely at their answers during the test. If they choose stupid answers, it's hard for me to not punch them in the back of the head. And I think that would get me fired. It was pretty boring so I had plenty of time to think. That's where this pensive blog comes in:

So, I've learned a few things from my dating experiences this year. I don't think a public blog like this is a good forum for specific relationship talk. That's pretty trashy. That's why I haven't mentioned my dating life on this blog. I still agree with the "no kiss and tell" policy. With all that being said, I want to write about some of the things I have learned in the past year from the guys I've dated. I'm purposefully choosing to not be specific about individual guys.

I hope I didn't lose you after that vague disclaimer. I've just learned a lot about what I want and don't want in a guy from my experiences.

Traditional male/female roles:
Traditional male and female roles are important to me. I like it when the guy plans the date. It is also a plus when they are good at thinking of creative things beyond just dinner and a movie, though that is fun too from time to time. I've been on some pretty interesting dates to a carnival, museums, disc golf, festivals, ice sculpture competition and more.
I like it when the guy opens doors for me, though the car door is a little over the top. I also like when the guy pays, though that doesn't mean he has to pay for everything. I think it's about showing that he can take care of me since being a provider is a guy's natural role.

Witty Banter:
This is something I have only recently pinpointed as something that is important to me. Most people who know me well know that I like to joke around and make people laugh. This doesn't mean I can't be serious when the situation calls for it, but I prefer to make light of most situations for my own amusement. I need a guy that I can just joke around and laugh with; a guy who I can have fun with just by talking to. I want a partner in life that will help me to have fun in boring, sad or difficult situations. It's also a plus if he knows a lot about Seinfeld and The Simpsons.

Outgoing:
I need a guy who is at least moderately out-going. I want a guy who would be remembered by people at a party. I'm not interested in a guy who is too quiet and I would feel like I need to ease into social situations. I especially appreciate guys who can get up and make fools of themselves in front of a crowd of kids. Maybe that's why I always get a mini-crush on the guys who perform the skits at Young Life camp.

Smarter than Me:
This might sound strange but I really need to be with someone who's smarter than me- in most areas. I'm no genius (despite what my mom thinks) but I consider myself to be reasonably intelligent. The fact that a guy is smarter than me is more important than his age. He can be younger as long as he seems smarter. Grammar is also important to me. I'm sure this sounds snooty but I can't help but base my opinion of some one's intelligence on the way they write. Misspellings, misuse of homophones and bad punctuation all negatively affect my image of a person's intelligence. I know it isn't really fair but I can't seem to help myself.

There are plenty of other things I know I want in a mate ie; hard-core Christian and interested in sports but the aforementioned qualities are some that I have more recently realized the importance of. The dating I've done, both good and bad, has definitely been helpful in clarifying what I am looking for. Now if I could only find an intelligent, sports-loving, chivalrous, christian, outgoing, witty conversationalist who likes me back, I'd be in good shape.

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